shititsalion | Closed to loveandloyalty

Closed to loveandloyalty

[The battle actually hadn't lasted that long. Maybe 40 minutes at most. They had fought Stannis' army just outside their camp and at the end of it all, they had won. A good deal of Stannis' men lay dead on the field and the rest had retreated. Stannis himself hadn't been present but the defeat should be enough to discourage him for a while. Just a while. Loras had no doubt that he'd be back. Stannis had always been stubborn at the worst of times. Still, it had been a good battle and a good victory. Renly should be happy.

During the fight Loras had ended up face to face with a knight twice his age and twice his size. A big, strong man. He was proud to say that he had beheaded the man. Not before taking a nice deep slash to the bicep and a hard mace hit to the ribs but he had still killed the man. That was what was important. To him at least, his squire seemed to disagree. As they rode back to camp the boy was buzzing around him like a particularly obnoxious little bee, asking a million times if he was alright. To which Loras always answered "yes stop asking".

Back in his tent the boy helped him out of his armor, flying into a panic at the sight of the blood seeping through the arm of his cotton undershirt. Before he could stop him the boy scurried from the tent, returning with one of the camp medics. Soon everyone in camp would know he was injured now, thanks to his well intentioned squire. Margaery would be flying in soon and then probably Renly. It was silly. He felt just fine, though the more he settled the more he felt the pain in his side and the stinging of the gash on his arm.]

Really, I'm- [He began but hissed in pain instead as the healer peeled the shirt away from the wound on his arm. Okay, maybe letting someone look at his wasn't the worst idea. When the shirt came off, there was a large and colorful bruise already covering a good deal of his left side. Yes, that probably wasn't good]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

And you know that I will do whatever it is you need me to do. [He doesn't think he needs to tell Renly that but he will anyway, just to make sure]

It just makes sense for our two sides to work together. I'm sure this Robb Stark will see that. Lord Eddard was always a rational man. Perhaps his son inherited some of that.

[When Renly's smile falters, Loras' softens and he reaches up to cup the older man's face with his uninjured hand] When you heard I was injured, you were worried that I might be dying, is that it? You will never, ever have to face anything without me. The gods may not listen when they are prayed to but even they are not that cruel. And I would never willingly leave your side. I love you far too much for that.

[Loras doesn't need to say it, Renly already knows it. He can always trust in Loras Tyrell's devotion to him. If only everything else were so easy, so sure. Eddard wasn't always rational, or else he might have listened to Renly when Renly said they could seize Cersei and her children and prevent all this bloodshed, but he hadn't - and he lost his head for it. But for now he only nods and takes another sip of wine. They'll discuss further when he's feeling better.

Renly folds a hand over Loras's on his cheek, closing his eyes for a moment. Maybe he was scared when he first heard about his injuries; people always say they're just green boys playing at war, and maybe he's a little scared sometimes that they're right. But everyone is afraid of something.] I know you wouldn't. No one could tell me how serious it was at first, is all. But you have to admit, you aren't exactly careful sometimes.

[Loras scoffs, a soft, almost amused sound and lightly pats Renly's cheek]

I was wondering when it would come around to this. Is this where you tell me that I'm far too rash sometimes? Some would argue that this entire war is just that. What else would you have me do, love? Sit around barking commands while everyone else fights? That would not make me much of a commander.

You are sometimes, and don't say that, not when you encouraged this in the first place. [He probably never would have made a bid for the throne if not for Loras and the Tyrells. They're the only reason he has an army, Margaery wants to be queen, and Loras keeps telling Renly what a good king he will be.] I would have you grab for a little less glory, at least when it's going to end up with you bleeding like this. I need you, Loras.

I didn't say I thought that. Just that some people might. I happen to not care about the opinions of the people who think that. [He says it because he believes it]

You're being overdramatic. I'm not going to die from a little sword wound. I'll say it again: knights get hurt.

I am not being overdramatic! It isn't overdramatic to worry about you, especially when no one will tell me how badly you're hurt until I actually arrive at your tent!

Knights get hurt, and knights also die, but I can't lose you. I can't. And do not tell me you promise not to die, because I'm certain that knight you beheaded today made the same promise to his beloved.

I wasn't going to promise that. That would be a stupid promise. [Because he might die but now seems like a really bad time to bring that up]

This is war. Neither of us is exactly experienced in this area. Today was a fluke. Bad luck. All I can promise you is that I will do absolutely everything in my power not to leave you. It isn't something I want to do.

[That really isn't reassuring.]

I still want a promise that you'll be more careful in the future, or next time I will give the van to Randyll Tarly. I already know you don't want to leave me, but it doesn't make you less reckless sometimes.

[He's bad at being reassuring when it comes to his own safety]

Randyll Tarly? Are you drunk? The man can barely manage a sword and a horse at the same time! [He is actually a little insulted by this threat. And also pouting. Predictably] Fine, Your Grace. Next time I promise to show an appropriate amount of caution.

[He seems to realize his misstep and sighs, bringing a hand up to rub at his temple, turning away and starting to pace the tent slowly. Loras is pouting and he's still hurt, and Renly feels awful, even if he was in the right - Loras has him wrapped so beautifully around his little finger, not that he'll ever admit it.] Lord Tarly is a capable commander and you know it, don't be petulant. I'm not giving him the van, you're my Lord Commander and the glory should be yours, I'm just-

This is all very stressful right now. People are still sniggering behind my back about Margaery and now you're hurt and-

Did you just call me petulant? I am not a child, thank you.

[He huffs and goes over to throw himself down on the bed in the tent. Which turns out to be a terrible idea because it jostles his entire body and OW. FUCK OW. He squeezes his eyes shut and tries to will the pain away, only half listening to Renly. There is also probably some very restrained but still unknightly cursing. When the pain lets up a bit he opens his eyes and looks over at the other man]

Margaery is a bridge we'll cross at a later date. You can't be expected to focus on bedding with a war going on. [Ignoring that he and Renly have been having sex straight through this entire disaster] And I told you it isn't that bad. You're working yourself up far more than necessary.

You are being petulant. [He says with a roll of his eyes, but it turns to a concerned frown when Loras throws himself onto the bed. Immediately, he feels even worse, and crosses the tent to sit on the edge of the bed, arranging the pillows a little neater so Loras can make himself more comfortable.]

Don't jostle your ribs like that, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be putting my stress on you, not right now.

[Loras situates himself so he's more comfortable, letting out a long sigh and looking at Renly tiredly. He scoots over a bit, patting the spot next to him on the bed]

Stop that and come here. This arguing is getting us nowhere and I've had enough of it.

[He's probably fussing a little as he fluffs a pillow and then strokes a few curls away from Loras's forehead, sighing softly. After a moment, Renly stands up and sheds his crown, boots, and cloak, then climbs onto the bed beside Loras, careful not to jostle him.]

I know. I'll be glad when this war is over.

You are far from the only one who feels that way.

[He watches Renly get into bed with him, reaching out to take his hand when he's settled] I don't mean to make things more difficult for you. That is the last thing I want. But you have to admit, you weren't exactly being mature either just then. [He lifts Renly's hand and presses a gentle kiss to his knuckles]

I know you're under a lot of stress. And I know you think I don't understand that but I do. Do you think commanding an army is easy? It's not. Most of your bannermen think I'm a child playing at war. Which compared to them I suppose I am, considering how old and fat a great deal of them are. [Scoff] So perhaps just a bit I want to prove that being one of the finest warriors in Westeros isn't just empty words. But, for your sake, I'll be more cautious next time. I promise you that.

I was not lying when I said I thought you would be an excellent king. I still think that. And I am willing to do absolutely anything to make sure you get there. I'd die for you, without hesitation. And I know that is not what you want to hear from me so don't even say it. It's the truth. But I'm hoping it does not come to that. I rather like the idea of spending the rest of my life by your side, making sure no one ever hurts you or Margaery.

[He gives his hand a light squeeze, exhaling softly. He knows, of course, all the things Loras is telling him, he knows it because he knows his lover. They're young, but they've been closer than brothers for years, ever since Loras first came to Storm's End practically. Renly feels a familiar warmth uncurl in his chest, but at the same time, a tinge of icy dread. Of course it's flattering to know that someone loves you enough to die for you, but here, now, at war...] It doesn't seem so romantic anymore, knowing that you would die for me. They all think I'm just a frivolous child playing at war, as well, so I know, that you feel you need to prove yourself to them. I don't wish to begrudge you that, they need to see that you belong at my side, but-

I suppose it's just hitting me, that I could lose you if something went wrong. Some part of me always thought Robert was immortal too, and now look at him, gored by a boar because he drank too much wine.

It just doesn't seem worth being king, if you aren't there at my side in a rainbow cloak. [It comes out a little softer, and he presses his face lightly against Loras's good shoulder, tangling their fingers together.]

[He knows all this. Of course he does. He knows Renly better than anyone else in the world. Still, it's not easy to hear]

I don't know what to tell you, my love. Because, yes, it could happen. But....I can't let being afraid of that stop me from giving every battle my all. Not when so many of your men are going to their deaths. So you will just have to keep faith that I will always do my best to return to you. [A sigh and he presses a kiss to the top of Renly's head]

Do you know what I would really like? For us to just forget about all of this and sail somewhere warm. Maybe the Free Cities. We could live in a big house, have servants who love us and do absolutely nothing for the rest of our days. But that is an unrealistic dream and even thinking of it makes me sound far too much like a 14 year old maiden for my tastes. So instead I think I'll settle for this war being over and the Iron Throne being yours.

I know you can't, I don't want you to be afraid, can we just stop talking about how possible the worst is? [He mumbles against his shoulder, maybe sounding a little childish himself now. He feels he's earned it, though, always having to put on the smiling, confident young king face in front of the bannermen.

He manages a little smile.] If you truly wanted it, I would give it to you. That life, a sprawling manse by the sea in Pentos or Lys, no one around to care what we do in bed. [They're too embroiled in this war, they have obligations to their families, he knows, but still...] Having the Iron Throne would be nice too, though. Once we win this, no one can question our competency again.

Now who's being petulant?

It might be nice. But we can't. We started this and we have to finish it. I couldn't desert my family to the Lannisters. [Even though right now finishing it seems like a daunting, impossible task] No one. And then everyone in Westeros will see that you're just as amazing and I've always known you are.

[Daunting and impossible indeed. But things are going as well as they can, and Renly tries to keep that in mind. If they can crush Stannis or win him over, his bannermen will follow, and an alliance with the North will surely seal their victory over the Lannisters.]

I know. [He murmurs quietly, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. He wouldn't abandon the Tyrells either, especially not now that he's married to Margaery. Mace wants so badly for her to be Queen, and Renly thinks she deserves it.] They'll certainly stop seeing you as a child, and see what a fierce warrior you are.

[Those are certainly good things to keep in mind, Loras thinks. He has hope for an alliance with the North, since Lady Stark came all the way to see them. Maybe later he'll convince Renly to go talk to her again just to see if they can draw up some terms to present Robb with. Stannis....is going to be tough. He's not going to dwell on it right now though or let Renly dwell on it]

Just focus on winning this war and seeming....Kingly. Everything else can wait until after. There's no point worrying about it now when we have much bigger things to deal with. We can do this. We will do this.

[Lady Catelyn could certainly be easy to please, and she could likely talk her son into an alliance. All she wants is her daughters, her husband's bones, the family sword, and some Lannister heads - all things that Renly is perfectly willing to give her to keep the friendship between the Starks and Baratheons. He'll personally deliver Joffrey to Robb Stark himself, kicking and screaming, for some northern justice if he has to.

He's glad that Loras grounds him and keeps him out of his own thoughts, though.] Have I ever not seemed kingly? [It gets a smile out of him, and he leans up to press his lips softly to Loras's.] We must do this, or we die. That makes it simple, doesn't it?

Simple. [The tone he uses when he says that is dry but amused]

Since I am very committed to the idea of you not dying, yes, we must. [He presses another light kiss to Renly's lips before sighing] Do you have anything important to do at the moment or can you stay here for a while?

They have a saying at court, you know. When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. Seems almost disgustingly simple. [He trails his fingertips feather-light over the wrappings around his ribs, closes his hand over Loras's good one again.]

I'll stay as long as you wish. Have I ever been able to deny you anything?

Isn't high born society charming? [Really if he wasn't convinced Renly would make a great king, he wouldn't be doing any of this. It'll be worth it when they win though, he thinks]

Don't say that. I'll want you to stay all night. [He smiles, giving Renly's hand a squeeze] No, you certainly have not. Not even when I was supposed to be serving you. Then again, I'm the only reason we no longer have a platonic relationship so really you should be thanking me.

Closed to loveandloyalty

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)